so get with this rebel things and let's move...

okay so i failed that quiz i forgot to wake up for.. lucky for some reason, i was awakened by something around 5:30 am.. soo i read two chapters, well skimmed it.. arrrgghh.. no time at all.. i hate when alarms fail.. specially for this class because my teacher's rule is if you're late even by one second, you can't take the quiz for that day.. i have missed 3 so far and don't even pass the other ones.. fuck, i gotta study HHHAAARRDD! for that final exam.. it may seem hopeless for now but i just gotta try harder.. and today.. went to walk my friend to work who i missed a lot since she went to europe.. nice, next time it's going to be a longer walk.. promise.. and then went to my friend's house while he takes a shower cause we're going to workout.. speaking of working out, we both forgot our locks so i had to run to buy a lock.. and body is sore all over again.. it's all good.. my brother actually said "are your muscles fake? is it plastic? it looks bigger" lol .. thanks buting.. at least it's working.. and now .. i should sleep soon.. but i just wanna nap because N*E*R*D is performing at the tonight show with jimmy fallon at 12:30.. they are just crazy... so crazy you just snap your neck when they perform.. them and the roots at the same stage.. can't miss it.. soo i guess i'll be spazzing if i want to tonight.. so tired but good night!

here we go!!!

she wants to move (native tongues remix) (feat. common, mos def, q-tip & de la soul)



to the "um, chika ah, da um um, da ah"

fought the love, through fucked up weather...

today was good.. me and the boys went to st. louis bar for a pitcher of beer and i got me some wings and fries.. ohh yea.. i was eating it by telling myself to run more after that, .. :S.. and eww i hate beer.. i actually had a huge glass and they told me me to chug it.. arghhh gross beer belly, never again.. next time, give me some cocktail.. call me a girl i don't care.. also, the random sex talk.. boys will be boys.. and there was this moment when they thought i was tipsy cause i was laughing so hard when we started talking about "happy ending". go check it out on urbandictionary.com if you don't know what it means LMAO!!.. ohh man, it was just funny.. so thursdays are officially "get-drunk-in-the-afternoon day'.. not for me though..

now i need to study for my quiz which for some reason are the hardest quizzes i ever take every friday... actually, im going to take a nap right now.. peace!!

and listen to some good tunes.. here we go!!

we fight/we love remix (feat. kanye west & consequence) - q-tip

no pain, no gain..

i am sooo sore.. but a workout is a workout.. it was a good one.. and i feel sexier..mmmm.. yumm..LOL.. thanks man for being there..

& this song is for you.. i half care about you nowadays. whatever that means .. well i still do but i don't care what you do with your life anymore.. that's a first.. this is my last post for you.. "enough of you" BRAH!! oh well... it's cuz i saw someone that i didn't really want to see.. and i was just like.. "oh shit it's him yo" and my friend was just like "if this makes you feel better, he's pretty ugly" right buddy??..but then again it wasn't me who said it, so i'm not judging. or anything. it was hilarious tho.. lucky the guy left right before we finished working out.. "don't do anything you will regret" hahaha.. ohh god i dont think my friend can read this but man, lucky you were there. but it's not like i would've done something stupid anyways..not worth it.. we would've just played ball with him and you know, i would have guarded him and blocked his ass and showed him some move here and there. hahaha.. okay enough.. and btw why does this guy even deserve a blog spot.. get it??.. a spot on my blog.. aiite really, enough!!.. *yawn* i'm dozing off, peace!!

tracks of my tears - boyz ii men (original by smokey robinson & the miracles)

i love boyz ii men!! and this song..yes motown baby..

it is only fitting...

my ultimate favourite song and the most amazing song in my book...

erykah badu and common still look cute together.. and erykah badu is an OG.. fucking swag... dang! this video made me smile until the end. specially the hug. "special for you and me" and erykah badu beatboxing ms. officer. LOOOL..

TO THE LADY I LOVE THE MOST..

Happy 52nd Birthday to my Mother,

Mrs. Emma Villanueva Almario

you are one of the most amazing mother in the whole wide world (used one of the most because i know every mother out there is amazing in their own way). thank you for showing that you care, love, support, understand, listen and so much more. so grateful to have a mother like you and i love you so much. i wish you good health and fifty more birthdays. so go get healthier okay? you gotta lose weight. God bless always and i always pray for you and dad.

&toyou

mother knows best. they care for you like that because they are being hard on you. real love does not mean to always protect and feel you secure but instead bring out the best in you and make you realize things. how far can security come really? they don't care if you will hate them because they don't care about that. they just want to show that they care if it even means you hating them. i know how that feels because i loved you like that. always fight through your stubbornness and your hard-head. in return, you despised our arguments. that's how my parents love me and that's real love. they make me strong and realize my mistakes. they are not going to be there for you because in the end, it is up to you to love yourself and learn from your mistakes. your family is always cheering for you to be the best you can be. i think that's real love. it is not always the kind words that means love but the thought of it. there's a thin line between love and hate and just because they are yelling at you doesn't mean they hate you. i know that myself and you should know that by now. cliches are getting over played nowadays but family will always be there for you. i am part of that family. you just gotta know the meaning of family and gotta know who they are. maybe it just takes for you to run to your family instead to realize how much they really care. you might feel like they are not there but they are. other people will have other agenda. they like you, you were there for them before and they are just doing the same but family will not ask for something in return. not your love, not your attention, not your friendship, nothing. they are going to be there for you just because. smarten up, take care and keep ya head up! BE STRONG!! GO BABY!

kid cudi - the sky might fall (prod. by kanye west)

i'm not loving you, the way i wanted to..

thank you for everything!!

but man, you gotta stop calling me. it ain't cool. i know you called me once but man, it is not going to work. seriously, you ain't helping me. if you want to be my friend, then leave me alone. i can do this. i don't want to hear your voice, read any message you might send me later, even see you. you only stay friends when you want to get back together. clearly you don't and i'm starting to feel .. well if she's ready to let go then i gotta let go too. i've given up the idea of getting back together. it takes two to tango. i fucked up but it doesn't mean i should hurt myself even more. friends should be *platonic* but everytime i see you, all i do is steal kisses, hugs, stare in your eyes, and relive the past. that's not good and i want it to stop. some guy might have disrespected me but i believe in karma. what goes around comes around. you don't prey on girls and wait for them when they are vulnerable. probably said, "ohh you can do better blah, blah, blah" to replace his ugly ass ex-girlfriend. pull that "nice guy" persona. the fool ain't even a nice guy because if he was, he would have respect. it's a deed of the devil. you don't do that ever. if i can beat this guy up i will. you know who you are, you son of a bitch. there's a reason you never looked me in the eyes nor even acknowledge me. you're a pussy BRAH! but then again, it will not take me to my destination. i am going to be the mature one and leave you two alone. if you want to fall in love with someone else then go ahead. you can picture yourself with someone else anyways so i guess we are now history. i am not going to be your friend though. you're the one who backstabbed me because you knew all along. we were amazing but we lost the spark. and it was your choice. take care and besides, you're happy now.

AND BODY SOO SORE! CAN'T-LIFT-ARM!! DAMN WORKOUT.. NO PAIN, NO GAIN THOUGH!

there's nothing left to say..

so far to go - j dilla feat. common and d'angelo

who the fuck am i? i'm being treated like all the other guys you hid from me.. grow the fuck up.. you can't do this because i told him i did this eventhough i did that.. sometimes i wonder what else you hid from me.. well whatever .. if you're just going to treat me like that .. then don't ask me for friendship... don't ever text me, don't ever call me or don't ever talk to me on msn.. you have your own life now.. what are you going to do, treat the same guy with all this bullshit.. i'm going to do you a favour and never talk to you ever again, don't ever check up on me because who cares really.. do you or you just say that to know if i'm still alive.. after 5 years i deserve that treatment??.. well, screw you and your goddamn friendship i never really wanted to settle for less... it seems like i just help you move on.. so much sacrifices even when we are not together., sacrifice my own emotional well being for you, always that guy to always cater to that girl, always be there for her because you love her that much but nah.. you can only do so much but like you said you gotta be selfish.. whatever .. you're whatever now.. you're just an ex now and it will just stay like that.. if i survived now, i can survive in the future.. fuck my promise of always being there because clearly you stepped out of my life.. you're the one who gave up on me and never guided me through that ordeal because after we've been thru ,you just got sick of me.. just like what q-tip said.. "at the end of it all it was you.."

on another note: i love my new nike zoom kobe 4.. and my new nike free everyday.. yes, imma run me some serious K's and play some serious ball .. fucking a... and for you, use your painting stuff.. you bought them for a reason... and that is to get in touch with your old artistic self.. get on that .. and i just proved that i still seem to care no matter what .. oh well.. its just me..

the prayer..

last night when i was about to sleep and after i prayed, i was lying down and saw this song on my iPod. i thought it was just fitting. lol gayyy.. you know when a song gets stuck in your head no matter if it's the melody, lyrics, chorus or the whole or whatever .. it was just stuck in my head last night.. and tonight... i'm going to listen to this song again right when im about to sleep and probably every night now.. man.. i love this song...
okay maybe not every night...

"And if I die before I wake, I pray the Lord my soul to take
But please don't cry, just know that I have made these songs for you
And if I die before I wake I pray the Lord my soul to take
'cuz I'm ready for a funeral"

now put your hands up in the sky and lemme hear you say....

so recently, kanye did his "live on vh1 storytellers" and this "good life" performance reminded me of when i went to his concert with a few friends. we were all scattered around but we were together in spirit. and that night, the "good life" performance was the longest and most hyped up performance. that was when he repeated parts over and over. amazing!!.. i almost lost my voice that night... and he did it again, this time at vh1. i think he loves this song and personally, i love it too. also in the beginning, he said something about taking tragedies and loses to his advantage because it is all God's plan and used that to make what kind of man he is today. and like me, i'm restarting my life slowly but surely. now, i have aspirations to do things for me to grow. take up things i haven't gotten the time and always wanted to do. it is up to you to use that to your advantage. it is hard but you just pick yourself up and do what kanye said. don't get left behind even more... so thank you kanye!! one day, i will see you again live....